Attitudes That You Should Avoid When A Relationship Ends

Ending a relationship is not usually easy, many memories remain, also, depending on how things happened, there may be mixed feelings that inevitably make you feel bad. But this is not the end of the world, to overcome a break it is necessary to avoid these typical attitudes that damage your peace of mind and emotions.

There are good and bad ways to end a relationship. We are aware that there are many emotions at stake. Many doubts and questions that possibly remain forever unsolved. Let’s avoid being trapped in that amber resin where many remain established for years suffering from that end, from that rupture.

When a relationship ends, a stage of our life also closes. Accepting this new reality as soon as possible will make it easier for us to face grief with greater dignity. In this way, we can remake our present to face a new future with greater resilience. However, achieving this is not easy, hence, it is essential to avoid a series of attitudes and behaviors:

1. Try to get back in touch

The relationship has ended for both, therefore, the most advisable thing in these cases is to give way to a duel to release emotions, vent, and proceed to acceptance. Now, if, far from assuming that reality, we remain obsessed with the idea of ​​trying again and contacting, we will shape a state that is as debilitating as it is frustrating. This makes the situation even worse, we lose dignity and self-esteem, and we deny ourselves the opportunity to start over. It is not healthy to chase, call, show up at your ex’s workplace, home, or places that your ex frequents, this often causes the other person to start having feelings of rejection towards you.

2. Do not look for guilty and less project the responsibility on you.

Sometimes we do. We fall into those suffocating circles of thought where we tell ourselves that we have done it wrong, that we should have acted in such away. We repeat to ourselves that perhaps we were not made for that person, that we are failures in matters of love. But what good are these types of internal dialogues? obviously for one thing: to hurt us more. It is not necessary to look for guilty and even less to project that guilt on us to boycott our self-esteem. Sometimes, one of the two evolves in a different sense than the one that united them in the beginning, love ends and we cannot do anything else but assume it.

3. Think about how your life was before

When a relationship ends it is common to get stuck in that recent past. We miss not only that person, in addition, we experience the emptiness of the routines of yesteryear, of those little details that orchestrated our lives. Now, we must reorder priorities, and the only real priority is ourselves. The time has come when we must move forward, turn the page, to create new experiences and memories. Do not read past conversations, or check social networks or email, that does not help you at all.

4. Reinforce our grief with sad books, movies, or songs.

Our brain will try. He will ask us to reinforce his grief with stimuli that are at the same emotional level. That is why sad or romantic movies attract us, songs that talk about impossible loves, etc. Let’s try to impose new routines on ourselves. Let’s make changes, incorporate new experiences, new goals, hobbies, etc. We must always think about our emotional and mental well-being. We have to get out of the hole, not sink further into it.

5. Waiting and having illusions that the other person will return.

When a relationship ends, our mind is not convinced. The longing and the hope are still there, like pins bent on hurting us. So, let’s avoid feeding suffering by waiting for it to appear. Maybe walking down, the street where they always met, going to the same restaurants, etc. Let’s avoid fantasizing about these possible encounters and apply a growth mindset. This stage is over and you must start a new one. Do not set false expectations, this does a lot of damage and does not allow you to get over the breakup.

6. Turn the page also on social networks

That is an important issue when a relationship ends. If you have an active life in social networks, try to update your profile. Furthermore, as much as possible, avoid keeping in touch with your ex. The preferable thing in these cases is to stop following that person to avoid seeing their updates, to stop obsessing, asking us, hurting us, turn the page in your life and also on social networks.

7. Pretending to lengthen the pain when a relationship ends.

It is normal feel pain, because all these emotional experiences are part of the grief itself. And as such you have to live it without anesthesia, without hot packs. So, if you feel upset and sad, cry. It is important to release everything that this break left to renew ourselves without negative charges. Now, when a relationship ends it is advisable not to extend those moments of pain for many days. Better a lot of intensity and a few days.

8. Wanting to find out what the other person is doing or keep waiting for them to contact you.

No more. Don’t expect me to call you. If you look at the mobile, it may be to know what time it is, but not to see if he wrote you or if he is online. Don’t nonsense just to get their attention. If that person left you to be with someone else, stop wishing them badly or thinking that “I hope they break up soon” so that he/she can return to you, those kinds of thoughts are no healthy to you and only fill you with negative energy. Remember that, from now on, you are your priority. Ultimately, when a relationship ends, when it does not work, it is best to leave the road free. This way you will have the opportunity to live your life differently and meet new people.

Remember this phrase that the great Buddha said and summarizes this article with great certainty: “Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional.”

Love yourself, value yourself, respect yourself and honor yourself!

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