The Highs and Lows Of Being The Other Woman

By: Psychic Rhonda

So lately you have spent the majority of your nights pacing the floor and being torn between being patient or walking away. Whether your relationship with someone else’s mate was planned or not one thing is for sure, you have found the situation much harder than you anticipated. You may have told yourself in the beginning that you could handle it or you wouldn’t allow yourself to get too involved but somehow it happened and now you are in a state of constant doubt..about the relationship as well as within yourself. Some of the common traits that I have seen from my experience are as follows:

 

 

  • Constant comparison of yourself to the other party which often leads to viewing yourself as less than.
  • Questioning whether or not you are truly loved and valued by this person or taken advantage of.
  • Feeling a sense of being “stuck” because you have invested too much to walk away but yet not enough progression to stay.
  • Feeling as though you are meant to be but things are just complicated at the moment.
  • Fears of being left alone in the end.

One of the biggest factors that you must remember if in these shoes are that no matter what your partner is telling you, you are only receiving THEIR half of the story and in most cases may not be the entire truth. Remember, they are already being dishonest in their relationship. The elephant in the room(Trust) is never addressed but its always an underlying issue. When they become distant you wonder if you are being pushed away or if there is anyone else besides you. The circumstances may even make you feell as though you shouldn’t question them or the nature of the way you are being treated and that you should accept this and this is the way it is. They may even go as far as telling you blatantly that you knew what you were getting into from the beginning. This is true but also, so did they..they too are as responsible as you are. It’s only natural to grow attached to someone which is why you have to be careful putting yourself in these positions.

We all desire to be loved and respected and perhaps a chain of bad relationships has led you to make choices that are out of the norm or based on loneliness. Your worth may have been compromised in the process and you may have been seeking validation of some kind or even a sense of security. Maybe this person provides you with these things and at times you feel on top of the world and inseperable. They can also be a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on when needed. After all, it is the good qualities that makes us fall in love with them however do NOT fall out of love with yourself in the process.

Being placed on the back burner and having limited interaction and communication with someone and only when its convenient for them can be emotionally damaging to you and can definitely place you at a low point. You may even find yourself in an unhealthy cycle in which you are looking for happiness and fulfillment in the very same person you lost it in. Hoping and waiting for something that may never happen. In this situation with clients I have came to realize that only the cheater really wins. They have the attention and love from two or more people and their needs are exceeded but at the expense of others.

While these connections do sometimes work, no one should have to accept or believe that they are only capable of being partially loved. Never give up or settle for less than what you deserve just because it isn’t happening in the time frame that you want. We are often alone for a reason and that reason is usually to learn and love ourselves so that we are properly ready to receive true love and nothing short of that..patience is not a punishment..it is to help you grow. Remember this, “If something cost you your peace of mind it is too expensive.”

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