Dating a Narcissist

By: Psychic Rhonda

ME, ME MEEEEEE!..a narcissist mentality. I’m sure you have came across this fine specimen of a human at some point in your life. Totally self-absorbed. Smh..these people need their own planet; I’ve been saying it for years. Everything is about them even when they have wronged and hurt you, it’s somehow YOUR fault. They are very manipulative and cunning. They never take accountability for their actions and are never wrong. If you are not careful they will have you second guessing yourself or worse blaming yourself. This person can be very toxic whether it be a friendship or relationship. They are takers, not givers, by no means. They demand you do it all! There is no balance whatsoever and absolutely no fairness.

I remember briefly dating one and when I confronted them about seeing someone – somehow we drifted off into a conversation about painful childhood memories and I found myself empathizing  and offering a shoulder if needed before I realized just what the heck was going on! If you find yourself feeling neglected and you confront your partner about it and then told you are insecure, always starting an argument, or crazy, you may have a “narcy” on your hands. You will receive no explanation ,only blame, and you will be left feeling like..”Did I over-react?”, “Am I insecure?” We all have differences but no partner should make you feel bad or foolish when expressing your feelings to them or addressing the way you feel you have been treated. You should be comforted and understood, not ridiculed.

If you feel your feelings have to be placed on the back burner in order to keep your partner happy, that’s not a healthy relationship..Your feelings are important and you should remove yourself from that situation. They may even suggest to you that you should put their feelings before yours in order to have a successful relationship and call you selfish for not doing so. A narcissist can really lower your self-esteem if you allow them to. They will have you feeling as though you are the problem and make you feel as if you are unlovable when asking for treatment that you actually deserve in a relationship. You begin to doubt yourself and in the meantime this gives them the leeway to get away with continuing to mistreat you.

Never ignore those nagging feelings of sadness or worry about if you are truly valued and loved. In a healthy relationship you would never wonder where you stand. Your partner would never put you in a positon to feel that way.  Also, do not be fooled to believe that you can heal this person or that they will eventually realize your love for them and change. It’s not going to happen. Due to their selfish nature they are not able to see past their needs and wants and their mental state does not allow them to see their behavior as a problem. Remember, a person cannot change what they fail to acknowledge. I hope you find this information useful and consider the red flags to avoid the heartache or remove yourself from a current toxic situation that does not serve your highest good. Love is not pain and hurt, it is joy and happiness..maybe not all the time but the good should always outweigh the bad.

If you are worried about your current relationship or if your partner has shown some of these signs, please feel free to reach out to me in app. I would be glad to look into them and provide you with honest insight.